Under Review

The Middle-Aged Misanthropes of the Wisconsin Trilogy

《威斯康星三部曲》中的中年厌世者
Nate Lippens’s autobiographical series has earned a word-of-mouth following for its coruscating prose and frank view of Midwestern gay life.
内特·利彭斯的自传体系列以其犀利的文笔和对中西部同性恋生活的坦率描绘,赢得了口口相传的读者群。
A man with an earring in profile and a couple by the window in New York at night.
Illustration by Derek Abella

“Every character should want something,” goes an overused adage of fiction-writing workshops, popularized by Kurt Vonnegut. (“Even if it is only a glass of water,” he added.) Novels centered on gay male experiences have, historically, epitomized this maxim. There’s the want for sex, often lots of it; for youth, exemplified most famously by Thomas Mann’s 1912 novella, “Death in Venice”; and for acceptance from straight culture, especially in work birthed during the peak of the AIDS crisis, such as “Second Son” (1988), by Robert Ferro, in which a man with a deadly virus navigates his relationship with his close-knit family. Not to mention, a desire for glamour and for life’s finer things—travel abroad and summers in the country—that must be chased the way a collector would an unpaid credit-card bill. Edmund White’s 2016 gem, “Our Young Man,” opens with portrayals of a journalist and a bartender who scrape together their incomes in order to afford a house share on the Fire Island Pines in the early nineteen-eighties—a luxury, the book implies, that would be financially prohibitive in this millennium.

“每个角色都应该有所求”,这是小说写作工作坊里一句被用滥的箴言,经库尔特·冯内古特之口广为流传。(“哪怕只是一杯水,”他补充道。)以男同性恋经历为中心的小说,历来是这条准则的典型体现。有对性的渴望,往往还是大量的;有对青春的渴望,最著名的例子当属托马斯·曼1912年的中篇《魂断威尼斯》;还有对异性恋文化接纳的渴望,尤其是在艾滋病危机高峰期诞生的作品中,比如罗伯特·费罗1988年的《次子》,书中一个身染致命病毒的男人在关系紧密的家庭中艰难维系亲情。更不必说,还有对光鲜生活与精致事物的渴望——出国旅行、乡间避暑——那种追逐的劲头,如同收藏家追讨一笔未付的信用卡账单。埃德蒙·怀特2016年的佳作《我们的年轻人》开篇描绘了一位记者和一位酒保,两人在八十年代初拼凑收入,只为在火岛松林合租一栋度假屋——书中暗示,这种奢侈放在本世纪将是经济上无法承受的。

The first-person speakers of Nate Lippens’s Wisconsin Trilogy have checked out from want. They toil as bartenders and caterers; off the clock, they’re misanthropes with a few trusted confidants and a bevy of deceased acquaintances who occupy their thoughts. Across Lippens’s cycle of semi-autobiographical novels—“My Dead Book,” from 2021; “Ripcord,” from 2024; and “Bastards,” on shelves this fall—these unnamed narrators share biographical details, enough that they seem to be the same character. Each fled home and school at fifteen, learning from a ragtag, self-designed syllabus of twentieth-century literature, cult cinema, punk rock, and queer art. Each endured stretches of junkiedom and stints in mental facilities, and spent young manhood hustling and hanging out with other sex workers, surviving the most disastrous period of the AIDS epidemic in the United States by becoming precociously steadfast. The narrator of “My Dead Book” recalls, about “social workers, outreach volunteers, and youth counselors” from the era, “They trained us to be vigilant. No exceptions. They saved our lives and they taught us not to trust anyone.” No surprise that he’s held on to his obstinance, as he admits elsewhere: “Negativity is my strength. I’m a man of my word and that word is usually no.”

内特·利彭斯“威斯康星三部曲”中的第一人称叙述者们,早已放弃了“有所求”。他们以酒保和宴会侍应生的身份辛苦谋生;下班之后,他们是厌世者,只有寥寥几个信得过的知己,以及一大批占据他们思绪的已故熟人。在利彭斯这套半自传体小说系列中——《我的死者之书》(2021年)、《跳伞绳》(2024年),以及今秋上架的《杂种》——这些未具名的叙述者共享诸多生平细节,多到让人觉得他们就是同一个人。每个人都在十五岁时逃离家庭和学校,从一份杂凑而成、自行设计的书单中学习,内容涵盖二十世纪文学、邪典电影、朋克摇滚和酷儿艺术。每个人都经历过吸毒成瘾的漫长时期和精神病房的短暂停留,在青年时代靠卖身度日,与其他性工作者厮混,在美国艾滋病疫情最惨烈的时期,以过早练就的坚韧活了下来。《我的死者之书》的叙述者回忆起那个年代的“社工、外展志愿者和青少年辅导员”时说:“他们训练我们保持警惕。没有例外。他们救了我们的命,也教会我们不要相信任何人。”难怪他一直固守着这份执拗,正如他在别处承认的:“消极是我的力量。我言出必行,而我说出的那个字通常是‘不’。”

The aging autodidacts of “Ripcord” and “Bastards” live alone in the Milwaukee area (“My Dead Book” depicts a prior spell in nearby Madison). They pass their free time watching movies, reading, remembering long talks with dead friends, chatting for hours with living ones, and wringing their hands over their chronic insomnia. They lodge their complaints in fragmented prose that splits the difference between comic zingers and poison bonbons. “Some people get the glory. Some people get the glory hole,” “Ripcord” begins. They are resigned to circumstance, their ennui wizened rather than fashionable. In “Bastards,” Lippens’s hero recounts the evening when he stopped trying:

《跳伞绳》和《杂种》中逐渐老去的自学者们,独自住在密尔沃基地区(《我的死者之书》描绘了此前在附近麦迪逊的一段时光)。他们打发空闲时间的方式是看电影、读书、回忆与死去朋友的长谈、与在世朋友聊上几个小时,以及为自己长期的失眠而焦虑不安。他们把抱怨倾注在碎片化的散文里,在喜剧金句和毒舌糖果之间拿捏分寸。“有些人得到荣耀。有些人得到荣耀洞,”《跳伞绳》开篇写道。他们安于现状,倦怠感是饱经世故的,而非时髦做派的。在《杂种》中,利彭斯的主人公回忆起他停止努力的那个夜晚:

I should make more money. That was the problem. I wasn’t succeeding. My hard work would pay off. And despite changes in names, cities, attitudes, cigarette brands, and drugs, the misbegotten notion of reward and advancement and achievement ruled until the night at the mirror. I burned my life to the ground. Job, apartment, friends, the whole goddamned thing. Afterward, clean and in shock, I saw the face in the mirror again, and I knew I wasn’t going to be a phoenix risen from my own destruction. I was going to lie in my ashes and call it done.

我应该多赚点钱。问题就出在这儿。我没有成功。我的辛勤工作会有回报的。尽管名字、城市、态度、香烟品牌和毒品换了一茬又一茬,那种关于回报、晋升和成就的错误观念一直统治着我,直到镜子前的那个夜晚。我把自己的生活烧了个精光。工作、公寓、朋友,所有该死的一切。之后,清醒过来,惊魂未定,我又看到镜子里那张脸,我知道自己不会成为从自我毁灭中涅槃重生的凤凰。我只会躺在自己的灰烬里,宣告到此为止。

And he does, dispensing with professional and social ambition in a way that feels realistic. After all, most of us, queer or otherwise, make our lives in the rubble of earlier dreams of success, mobility, and, yes, liberation. Aspiring artists submit to the practical necessities of paying off debt. Vacation plans get drowned in work duties. Free spirits become shackled spouses. Lippens forges poetry from disappointment, inhabiting this mood until it becomes familiar, even a source of connection. Curmudgeons, he knows, are relatable, their lives marked by the certainty that no fantasy will ever spring them from the drudgery of survival. His survivors find dignity in the grit, a hard-fought self-love. What looks like acquiescence might actually be resilience.

他确实这么做了,以一种令人信服的方式摒弃了职业和社交上的野心。毕竟,我们大多数人,无论是不是酷儿,都在早年关于成功、阶层流动,以及——没错——解放的梦想废墟上构筑自己的生活。有抱负的艺术家屈从于还债的现实需要。度假计划淹没在工作任务中。自由不羁的灵魂变成被束缚的配偶。利彭斯从失望中锻造诗意,沉浸在这种情绪里,直到它变得熟悉,甚至成为连接彼此的纽带。他知道,脾气古怪的人容易引起共鸣,他们的生活被一种确定性所标记:没有任何幻想能把自己从生存的苦役中解救出来。他笔下的幸存者在粗粝中找到了尊严,一种来之不易的自爱。看似认命的东西,也许恰恰是韧性。

“My Dead Book,” Lippens’s début novel and the first volume in the triptych, originally came out as a print-on-demand edition from the niche yet mighty press Publication Studio, in its Fellow Travelers series, an imprint dedicated to publishing overlooked writing, much of which deals in queer themes. Since then, the book, which Semiotext(e) reissued in 2024, has developed a word-of-mouth following, owing both to its coruscating prose and its frank view of twenty-first-century L.G.B.T.Q. life in the United States. The tremendous political gains that queer people made during the past two decades have given rise to a false sense of equality, concealing both the scars of history and the fresher wounds inflicted by more novel forms of homophobia. Simultaneously, as many have bemoaned in recent years, America has become too damn expensive.

《我的死者之书》是利彭斯的处女作,也是三部曲的第一卷,最初由小众却实力不凡的出版社“出版工作室”以按需印刷的形式推出,隶属其“同路人”系列——一个致力于出版被忽视作品的子品牌,其中许多涉及酷儿主题。此后,这本书在2024年由Semiotext(e)再版,逐渐积累了口碑,既因其犀利灼人的文笔,也因其对二十一世纪美国L.G.B.T.Q.生活的坦率审视。过去二十年间酷儿群体取得的巨大政治进步,催生了一种虚假的平等感,既掩盖了历史的伤痕,也遮蔽了更新形式的恐同所造成的创伤。与此同时,正如许多人近年来所哀叹的,美国已经变得贵得离谱。

Lippens’s narrators are products of this status quo. Without a college or high-school degree, their job prospects are limited. The narrator of “Ripcord” cannot pass a credit check. The narrator of “Bastards” does not have a bank account. They hook up but have given up on relationships. When a friend tries to set him up on a date, the narrator of “Ripcord,” who cannot even care for a cactus, declines: “I say I’m retired.” Blurry, half-remembered calamities have forced them to start over from nothing, again and again. The inertia of their lives weighs on them. Now, as the narrator of “My Dead Book” quips, “The only person who would say I’m young is someone else my age.”

利彭斯的叙述者们就是这种现状的产物。没有大学或高中学历,他们的就业前景十分有限。《跳伞绳》的叙述者过不了信用审查。《杂种》的叙述者没有银行账户。他们仍有约炮,但早已放弃恋爱关系。当一个朋友试图给《跳伞绳》的叙述者安排一次约会时,这个连仙人掌都养不活的人拒绝了:“我说我已经退休了。”模糊的、只记得一半的灾祸迫使他们一次又一次从零开始。生活的惯性压在他们身上。如今,正如《我的死者之书》的叙述者调侃的那样:“唯一会说我还年轻的人,是跟我同龄的人。”

Lippens’s début has a more straightforward—less shattered—structure than its sequels, focussing on salad days spent turning tricks and taking drugs. Its tone is elegiac, unsurprising considering that first novels so often explore the accrued pain of the writer’s life to date; still, for Lippens, that date was later than for most authors. “My Dead Book,” published when he was fifty, sports an uncommon polish and perspective for an inaugural effort. As the narrator grieves friends he lost to disease, drugs, and suicide, the book bypasses the bildungsroman to investigate more uncharted territory: the making of a crank. Childhood, he tells us, was a litany of obstacles that had to be overcome, a stretch that was “sad and confusing, and those feelings only grew with time.” The novel’s bleak, lucid tone fit the height of the COVID-19 pandemic, which was raging when the book first arrived. “Online I’ve seen friends lament their shut-in status and cabin fever, making jokes about The Shining,” its narrator reflects, comparing the isolation of an Upper Midwest winter to his own penchant for solitude. “I’m not about to tell anyone that often days, sometimes weeks, pass without me going outside.”

利彭斯的处女作结构比后续两部更直白——不那么支离破碎——聚焦于卖淫和吸毒的青春岁月。其基调是挽歌式的,这并不令人意外,因为处女作往往探索作者迄今为止人生中积累的伤痛;不过,对利彭斯来说,这个“迄今为止”比大多数作家来得更晚。《我的死者之书》出版时他已五十岁,作为首部作品,其打磨程度和视角都非同寻常。叙述者哀悼那些死于疾病、毒品和自杀的朋友,这本书绕开了成长小说的套路,转而探索一片更少有人涉足的领域:一个怪脾气之人的养成。他告诉我们,童年是一连串必须克服的障碍,是一段“悲伤而困惑的时光,而那些感受只随着时间愈发深重”。小说阴郁而清醒的基调,恰好契合了该书首次面世时正在肆虐的新冠疫情高峰期。“在网上,我看到朋友们哀叹自己的禁足状态和幽居病,拿《闪灵》开玩笑,”叙述者反思道,将中西部偏北地区冬天的与世隔绝与自己偏爱独处的习性相比较。“我不会去告诉任何人,经常好几天、有时候好几个星期过去,我都不出门。”

“Ripcord” is an arch, complex successor and in many respects a more impressive accomplishment—partly because it departs from its predecessor’s most evident influence, Gus Van Sant’s 1991 film, “My Own Private Idaho.” This Shakespearean tragedy of sex work courses through “My Dead Book” and Lippens’s plaintive evocations of the camaradarie and cavorting of hustlers in the eighties and nineties. “Ripcord” keeps us for the most part in a contemporary moment, a difficult shift that Lippens manages nimbly. He amps up the language, building an environment from his narrator’s shtick, a prosodic jungle gym of jokes, derision, self-deprecation, and asides about old Hollywood starlets, experimental writers, and outré musicians. Instead of burying bourgeois culture beneath the protagonist’s punky youth, “Ripcord” contends with it. All the narrator’s capacity for deflection comes into play as he deals with the humdrum present, the reality that nothing will change—certainly not himself.

《跳伞绳》是一部狡黠而复杂的续作,在许多方面是更令人瞩目的成就——部分原因在于它摆脱了前作最明显的影响来源,即格斯·范·桑特1991年的电影《不羁的天空》。这部关于性工作的莎士比亚式悲剧贯穿于《我的死者之书》,以及利彭斯对八九十年代男妓之间情谊与嬉闹的哀婉描绘之中。《跳伞绳》大部分篇幅将我们置于当代时刻,这是一个艰难的转变,而利彭斯处理得游刃有余。他加强了语言的力度,用叙述者的个人腔调构建出一个环境——一座由笑话、嘲讽、自嘲,以及关于好莱坞老牌女星、实验作家和另类音乐家的闲笔组成的韵律攀爬架。《跳伞绳》没有把资产阶级文化埋葬在主人公朋克式的青春之下,而是与之正面交锋。叙述者全部的回避功力都派上了用场,用来应对平淡乏味的当下,应对什么都不会改变的现实——尤其是他自己不会改变。

Lippens picks the right subject to explore this midlife immovability: sex. For his narrator, promiscuity is a respite and a diversion, never a tool to open possibilities for the future, not even when he gets close to someone who makes him briefly engage in “romantic delusions.” This lover, Dustin, is younger and married. He misses the narrator’s conversational reference to the actor Angie Dickinson and dislikes one of his favorite novels because it lacks “redemption.” Yet they have a dynamic that tempts the narrator to lower his defenses, until Dustin breaks things off because his husband reads their texts.

利彭斯选择了正确的主题来探索这种中年的不可撼动:性。对他的叙述者来说,滥交是一种喘息和消遣,从来不是打开未来可能性的工具,即便当他接近某个让他短暂陷入“浪漫妄想”的人时也是如此。这个情人叫达斯汀,更年轻,已婚。他听不懂叙述者聊天时提到的演员安吉·迪金森,也不喜欢叙述者最爱的小说之一,因为那本书缺乏“救赎”。然而他们之间的互动让叙述者一度想要放下防备,直到达斯汀因为丈夫看到了他们的短信而终止了关系。

The protagonist reacts to the fissure with a self-lacerating wit that can’t hide an underlying egotism. “I am a cliché. An older man having a nonaffair with a younger man. A lonely man in a lousy room saying tired words,” he disparages himself. His pride may be bruised, but, even during a vulnerable moment, it offers a kind of fortitude. Describing his abjection fuels his sense of superiority over others and his own circumstances. “They don’t understand when I say I’m a piece of shit, I mean they are pieces of shit too,” he says of acquaintances who fail to appreciate his self-effacing humor. “I’m using myself as the stool sample for humanity.”

主人公对这段裂痕的反应是一种自虐式的机智,但掩盖不住底层的自我中心。“我是个陈词滥调。一个年长男人和一个年轻男人搞着一场不算外遇的外遇。一个孤独的男人待在一间破房间里说着陈腐的话,”他这样贬低自己。他的自尊心也许受了伤,但即便在脆弱的时刻,自尊也提供了一种坚韧。描述自己的卑贱,反而助长了他对他人和自身处境的优越感。“他们不明白,当我说我是一坨屎的时候,我的意思是他们也他妈是一坨屎,”他这样评价那些无法领会他自嘲式幽默的熟人。“我是在拿自己当全人类的粪便样本。”

Lippens’s punch lines are unstoppable, his narrators like a tawdry standup comedian going whole hog in an empty theatre. “Bastards” is a meditation on performance as the self-aware heart of the gay working class. The book begins with the narrator, who has recently emerged from a psychiatric hold, rhinestoning the dress of a drag-queen friend—named Grace Period—in the middle of the night. This, he informs us, is his own grace period from the various types of social performance that subsistence demands of him: “The hours between midnight and dawn are best because I don’t have to stay in character.”

利彭斯的金句势不可挡,他的叙述者就像一个俗艳的单口喜剧演员,在空荡荡的剧场里全力以赴。《杂种》是一部关于“表演”的沉思录,将表演视为同性恋工薪阶层具有自我意识的核心。书一开篇,叙述者刚从精神病院强制留观中出来,深更半夜在给一位变装皇后朋友——名叫“宽限期”——的裙子贴水钻。他告诉我们,这就是他自己的宽限期,暂时摆脱生存所要求的各种社会表演:“午夜到黎明之间的几个小时是最好的,因为我不必待在角色里。”

To lose character means, among other things, to let his stiff upper lip loosen, to grow morose about ghosts. “Bastards” perseverates over one friend in particular, Rudy, an older gay man with an acidic outlook to match the narrator’s own. Recollections of Rudy reappear throughout, accompanied by a simultaneous thrill and annoyance with his rambling opinions—Rudy, too, could banter like there was always a camera on him. His prickliness molded the narrator, who was a teen-ager when they met. “Rudy was first chair in the mental peanut gallery of faces I pictured observing my life. I measured my actions in his imagined reactions. I saw the world in particular lights—Rudy-worthy details popped—so I could report back to him, a double agent.”

脱离角色意味着,除了别的,让紧绷的上唇松弛下来,为那些亡魂而黯然神伤。《杂种》反复纠缠于一个特定的朋友,鲁迪,一个年长的男同性恋,其尖刻的世界观与叙述者如出一辙。关于鲁迪的回忆贯穿全书,伴随着对他滔滔不绝的见解既兴奋又厌烦的复杂感受——鲁迪同样可以像永远有镜头对着他一样妙语连珠。他的尖刻塑造了叙述者,两人相识时叙述者还是个少年。“鲁迪是我脑海中想象着在观看我生活的精神看台上的首席观众。我用他想象中的反应来衡量自己的行为。我以特定的眼光看世界——值得讲给鲁迪听的细节会跳出来——这样我就能回去向他汇报,像个双重间谍。”

Both men “understood the obituarist’s tally and the gossip’s snark,” a useful dichotomy for Lippens’s trilogy. If “My Dead Book” is a collective eulogy and “Ripcord” a sardonic pillow book, “Bastards” merges these forms, spangling self-mockery across its surface as a survival mechanism and a means of fabricating delight.

两人都“懂得讣告执笔人的清点方式和八卦者的刻薄”,这对利彭斯的三部曲来说是一个有用的二分法。如果说《我的死者之书》是一部集体悼词,《跳伞绳》是一本冷嘲热讽的枕边书,那么《杂种》则融合了这两种形式,在表面撒满自嘲的亮片,作为一种生存机制,也作为一种制造快乐的手段。

Lippens’s characters bear an outspoken contempt for so many aspects of contemporary gay life—the drag-brunch fad, for instance, which the aforementioned Grace Period regards as inferior to the plucky drag scene of the eighties or nineties. Their disdain, though, is bespoke and self-protective, fanged yet functionally harmless. These are outsiders asserting the validity of a history that is always being forgotten.

利彭斯笔下的人物对当代同性恋生活的诸多方面表现出直言不讳的鄙夷——比如变装早午餐的风潮,前述的“宽限期”就认为它远不如八九十年代那种大胆泼辣的变装场景。不过,他们的不屑是量身定制的、自我保护性的,带着尖牙但实质上无害。这些是边缘人在为一段总被遗忘的历史伸张其正当性。

In spite of their occasional snobbishness, they refuse America’s truly destructive snobberies—the supreme regard accorded to money and material success, coupledom (rather than singledom), owning property (instead of renting it)—and lay bare how these values can feel inescapable even within oppressed microcosms like the queer community. The trilogy rebuffs the primacy of coastal metropolises and prestigious jobs, the sort of hierarchies the narrator of “Bastards” scorns as “status fetishes.” Lippens denies the premium that gay-male culture places on youth and masculinity. After an encounter with a man who insults him for not being butch enough, the narrator of “Ripcord” goes back on the app where they met: “I changed my profile to: 5”7’ fem with the face of an embittered sea captain, the voice of a pissed off fey concierge, and a body like an unmade bed.” The narrator of “Bastards” rues to a pal at a catering gig, “Last few years my close friends have winnowed to other effeminate gay men our age.” He doesn’t resent his friends or the intimacy of his circle, but he begrudges the normativity that has all but forced him into a narrow milieu.

尽管偶尔摆出势利的姿态,他们却拒绝美国真正具有破坏性的势利——对金钱和物质成功的至高推崇,对伴侣关系(而非单身)的偏执,对拥有房产(而非租房)的执念——并赤裸裸地揭示出,即便在酷儿群体这样受压迫的微观世界里,这些价值观也可以让人感到无处可逃。三部曲拒斥沿海大都市和体面工作的优先地位,拒斥《杂种》叙述者所鄙夷的那种“地位恋物癖”式的等级体系。利彭斯否定了男同性恋文化赋予青春和阳刚之气的溢价。《跳伞绳》的叙述者遇到一个男人,对方侮辱他不够阳刚,事后他回到两人相识的交友软件上:“我把个人简介改成了:5英尺7英寸,娘炮,长着一张愤懑老船长的脸,一副气鼓鼓的妖精门房嗓子,身材像一张没铺的床。”《杂种》的叙述者在一场宴会服务工作中向朋友感叹:“最近几年,我的密友已经缩减到只剩同龄的阴柔男同性恋了。”他并不怨恨自己的朋友,也不怨恨这个小圈子的亲密,但他对那种几乎把他逼进狭窄社交圈子的规范性心怀不满。

The issue, “Bastards” indicates, is one of class. The prejudices of a superficial society obsessed with social position nag at these books. Lippens is too much an aesthete, too slyly capable with surfaces, to ever use the term “classism.” His trilogy is a diagnosis dressed up in a rhinestone gown, shining brightly before a trick of the light reveals the rot underneath. ♦

《杂种》表明,问题的核心在于阶级。一个痴迷于社会地位的肤浅社会所持有的偏见,始终困扰着这些书。利彭斯太是个唯美主义者,太擅长在表面功夫上耍花招,绝不会使用“阶级歧视”这样的词。他的三部曲是一份诊断书,裹着水钻礼服,闪闪发光,直到光线的某个把戏暴露出底下的腐朽。♦

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